Friday, June 27, 2008

Tinkle Tinkle Little Blog...

Okay, by now most, if not all of you know how open I am about sharing my stories, my life, my funnies, right? Well, the following is going to show you just how brave I am, although I think the majority of you all are going to be shaking your heads, saying, "Why oh why did she feel the need to share? Has she no pride?" The answer to that would be, yes, I do have pride... I know it's somewhere here, I just can't seem to find it at the moment. And hell, when something funny happens, even if it is pretty embarrassing, how can I not share it with all my friends (and yes, strangers!) in Blogland?

Unfortunately for me, it's not just my chicks that routinely read this, but a handful of guys (hi PatrickRL! Hi Patrick S! Hi Artie!) and various family members, including my dad, my uncle and my mother-in-law. That being said, I'm still going to share with you my embarrassing moment. This won't take but a minute, so if you're in a hurry, just keep your pants on! I couldn't, but you'll read about that next.

Early this morning, probably around 6 a.m., I was laying in bed, fast asleep having a nice dream. In the dream I had to pee really bad so I went to the potty. Ahhhhhhhhhh... that feels much better!

You know that feeling, when you've held your bladder for as long as you possibly can, and finally, RELEASE! Well, unfortunately for me, I was getting that "Ahh" feeling not only in my dream, but in my bed!!!!!!!! I woke up to a very warm sensation and my body quickly put a clamp on it, but it was too late. I had wet my pants!!!!!!!!!!!
I hopped out of bed like someone had stuck me in the ass with a hot poker and I just stood there, listening to the shower running (Jimmy) and looking around the room to see who might be observing this moment of humiliation. Thank goodness, no one was there of course. Who did I expect to see in my bedroom at 6 a.m.? All my friends from Blogland? Nope, there were just a few sleepy-eyed kitties blinking at me. Whew!

Next I checked the sheets. Dry as a bone. Wow, that's like a miniature miracle! But my shorts were completely soaked and I was out of clean undies. What to do? What to do? I wasn't about to take a shower at this ungodly hour, and let's be reasonable, pee- pee is sterile, so why bother? Ah! Clean panties in the laundry room! But Jimmy could be out of the shower any moment and I don't want him to see me in this predicament! So, I whipped off my shorts and ran like a bat out of hell through the house to the laundry room to get some clean drawers.
Unfortunately, they were at the bottom of a heap of clean clothes I'd yet to fold so I sent laundry flying in all directions. Finally, clean ones!!!!!! So I put them on and calmly made my way back to the bedroom. Oh bonus, Jimmy was still in the shower. So I climbed back into my nice (dry) bed and almost instantly fell back to sleep.

I should be totally mortified after sharing all this with you, right? Well, I'm not. What does that say about me? And how many bloggy friends will I lose after this ridiculous post? ROFLMAO! Sorry, but it had to be done!


Until next time, Justine :o )

24 "Sister" Lovin' Friends Said:

  • Buffie

    LMAO!!!! Oh I've come close to that but never atcually PEED in the bed!!! I can't believe you'd share it with us but hide it from Jimmy! LOL!!!

  • Raxx - A day in the life

    Woohooo! Yes! you are certifiable! Why is it that i love crazy people?! This was so funny but the pic of depends at the end was precious!!

    btw,6am is not too early for a bath!! heeesh!

  • Justine

    Buffie, I told Jimmy on the phone and he said, "That's nice." ROFLMAO!

    And yes Raquel, unless there's something pressing in the a.m. I am NOT getting in the shower!

    Justine :o )

  • Buffie

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Penny

    That will teach you to get that laundry folded and put away! hahaha

  • Lisa

    OMG! So funny. I had to pee so bad the other morning and I was too lazy to get out of bed to do so. I kept dreaming of peeing. I am surprised I didnt!

  • Bridget

    Oh my you are too young for that problem! I hope you don't find this to be a recurring problem. You really should have a spare pair on hand a all times. I'll bet you got that laundry folded now just in case you need it again...hope you don't!

  • Tootsie

    okay....as I sit here and stare at this post...I ....okay I am in a state of speechlessness! I giggled...and giggled...my hubby is shaking his head...OMG girl...you just amaze me daily! this is hilarious....and strangely disturbing! see you next time.

    you are a skilled bedwetter though...not to wet the sheets! roflmao!

  • Life on Bonnie Lane

    Rofl! I have had dreams where I have to pee so badly and I go from toilet to toilet but the door doesn't shut or they are gross and I won't use them. Probably a good thing.

    I can't imagine you'd lose blog friends over this hilarious post. I guess it just "Depends." Har Har!

    Kady

  • French

    Too funny! Girl you crack me up! French;)

  • mrsben

    When my children were younger (in their teens) they'd often remark "too much information MOM". I never could understand why they would accuse me of such a thing.....until I read this....smiles. Will I come back and visit..you bet I will as you can't scare ME away that easily. Hugs

  • Life on Bonnie Lane

    Omg, I finally listened to the song that goes along with this post! Too funny. I love Weird Al. The song kind of reminds me of me. I have to take meds that make me pee due to high blood pressure and I don't go anywhere in the morning where I can't easily get to the bathroom!

    P.S. My daughter's boyfriend doesn't read the blogs, so she assured me we would be safe and he wouldn't see the wedding dress.

    Kady

  • Four in Costa Rica

    I just love that you found a song to accompany your late-to-the-potty post, Justine!

  • Anonymous

    Now I know just what to get you for your birthday! I will be looking for coupons in Sunday's paper. Hey.... I think I have some of those bed pads from the hospital you can have.

    Love Jill :O)

  • SchmeckyGirl

    You are insane girl! Insane. For three reasons...

    One. You told this to everyone you know.... and don't know.

    Two. You took of wet panties and put on new ones without even wiping down?!?!

    Three. Pee is not sterile! Okay, it is... but only when it's in your bladder. The "opening" where it exits your body is not sterile... so pee is riddled with bacteria. There I said it.

  • Justine

    EWwwwwwwwww Becky, thanks a LOT! Me hoo hoo had no bacteria, I just know it! Hey, do you know that in some countries women use pee to cleanse their faces? Gross!

    Justine :o )
    P.S. You were supposed to have your speakers on to hear the funny song that went with this post.

  • Tismee2

    I like you already and that was the first post I read!

    Doing some serious bloghoping this morning and have decided you HAVE to be the last or else my family will starve and the house will need fumigating.

    I realy need to look backa nd see what tips you can give me on St. Augustine. I will be there in 6 weeks time with my two boys in tow and need to find things to do to keep them occupied as we were there for 4 days last year and did a lot of the touristy stuff then.

    great blog

    Gail

  • Justine

    Hi Gail, and thanks for stopping by. I actually don't know much to tell you about St. Augustine that your probably haven't already discovered on your own. I'm sure you did the whole St. George Street shopping thing, the fort, etc.
    I can't believe you're coming here in August. that's CRAZY, so be prepared for ungodly heat and humidity and stay hydrated!
    Oh, my daughter just went to the Alligator Farm and had a wonderful time there, plus the Jacksonville zoo is spectacular, I'm told.

    Justine :o )

  • Tismee2

    Thanks anyway Justine - I'm sure we can find something new - I'm hoping to have a few mornings on the beach. Do you know what days they have the little craft fair there? We got there just as they were packing away last year.

    Also we were there in June when there was a mini tornado thing. We were on the little red train coming back from the Jail when it hit us - it was a bit scary but exciting too - beat our mediocre weather hands down. Loved how the rain ran off the rooftops and then down the gutter in torrents!!

    Do you go out to eat much? Where do you like to go? Any hidden jewels that us tourists wouldn't know about? We are staying at the St George Inn again - it wa sso peaceful and relaxing there.

    I know it will be hot as hell but it's the only time we can go this year due to my eldest taking exams, so we will just have to suffermore than usual. Have booked for April next year but intending to do a tour of the Gulf coast and the Keys that time plusoys. the obligatory few days for the Disneys and Universals for the b

  • Justine

    Gail, is that your blog? Squared Off? if so, I'll have a look-see a little later!

    As for eating out in St. Augustine, my very favorite restaurant over there is the Conch (pronounced conk) House. It's always super busy and they don't take reservations, but it's worth it in my opinion! Also, there's one right there on St. George, I think... The Colombia House. WONDERFUL food and they have this signature salad that is to die for!!!!!!!!!

    Justine :o )

  • Justine

    Btw Gail, you can email if you'd like so you don't have to keep coming to the blog. justwaaaa@comcast.net

  • Justine

    Gail, here's a link to the restaurant I was telling you about...
    http://www.conch-house.com/

  • Kathy

    Oh Your posts just get better (I know I am reading them the wrong way, but this is just so funny).

    One question, How are the protective knickers working out for you, haha. ROLF!. Kathy.

  • jill jill bo bill

    How did it not get your sheets wet? You must be magic. And funny as hell.