Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Get Comfy People, 'Cause The Sisters Take On St. Augustine!

You think my weekend adventures ended with putting up the Christmas tree Friday night? Oh no, Jill was staying the entire weekend and we had things to do, people to see, parties to attend, and cities to terrorize.

Early Saturday, Jill and I drove Alexa and Madison to a drop-off point... the girls were going to see The Nutcracker with Madison's brownie troop! How fun is that? Anyway, as we're driving, Jill starts talking to Mikayla:
Jill: Hey Mikayla, isn't this where your dad brought you to take pictures?
Mikayla: Silence
Jill: Mikayla! I asked you a question!
Me: Uh Jill? Mikayla is NOT in the car with us!
Yep, we started our day off on the right foot, as usual.

When the girls returned from their adventure, it was time to attend our community's annual Christmas party up at the amenities center. Santa was there, and looking mighty fake and dapper, and they even had teenagers doing face painting. Mikayla got a wreath (don't even ask me why she's wearing red lipstick... ask her aunt!) and Madison got the coolest panda!

Jill and the girls took a quick and crazy ride on a "train" around the parking lot, and Alexa and Madison had a great time playing in the huge bouncy house/slide thingamajig. Then it was time for the real trolley ride around the neighborhood to look at everyone's lights. Well, that's what we thought the ride was about. It turns out it was more like a taxi to drop off and pick people up at various stops throughout the neighborhood. The funniest thing is that the driver was going so fast (definitely over the 25 mph speed limit) that we couldn't even enjoy the lights, because they were flying by so quickly. It was like watching a light show on hallucinogens. Kinda like this.

And did I mention it was cold? Well, not freeze -your- nipples- off cold, but it was only 50 degrees and in Florida, 50 feels like 30 because of the humidity. Add in moving at the speed of light on an open trolley and you've got the makings for icicles up your nose. I think I may have lost one of my nipples on that ride but it grew back the next day.

As soon as we got home from that event, it was time for me to get ready for a Christmas party at our friends, John and Tracey's house. You may remember them from this post, although I had to remove the very best picture from it. Jill got to stay home with all the girls and do crafts. Heeheehee! Anyway, we got there near 8:30 and their house was packed to the gills with happy, jolly, festiveness. Nearly everyone brought a dish or alcohol, so needless to say, neither were in short supply. Although I do not partake of spirits, I can honestly say every food I tried was wonderful. Oh wait, I lied. I did try an itty bitty bit of homemade sangria. Yum!

I'd guesstimate that there were at least 40 people there, if not more, and I had a fabulous time with neighbor friends, and meeting new neighbors I've never clapped eyes on. We seem to have a lot of recluses (myself certainly included) around here. You see their dogs, but not the dogs' humans.

You may have noticed a set of burgeoning boobies in that collage, and I'll just have you know that I did not take that picture! For once I am totally innocent of wrong- and lude- doing! I went out in the screenroom to visit, and this strange chick was playing with my camera! When I asked her about it she handed it over with a giggle. I turned it on, and there were here BOOBS! She then introduced herself as Jami, and we became fast friends. Hell, anyone with the guts to photograph their own hooters is primo in my book. I did tell her to delete it or it might just accidentally purposely wind up on my blog. She said, "Go ahead! It won't bother me!" Ya think I should have gotten that in writing?

Alcohol was flowing, inhibitions were down, and some of the excessively drunk braver party-goers decided it was time to dance. Here's a short video clip of Grisel, Michelle, and a new guy I met, Steve. Unfortunately, the picture and sound quality sucks. You can't even hear the music, which was Styx singing Mr. Roboto. Oh yeah, takes ya back, doesn't it? Larry is in the background, just waiting around for John to get the i-pod up and running so he could do his Cher routine. Luckily, I left before this came to fruition. Scary!

Fast forward to Sunday. You didn't think I'd let you off this easy, did ya? Jill and I decided that we needed some retail therapy, so we planned a trip to the flea market, the outlet mall, and then downtown St. Augustine for some historic Christmas atmosphere.

I decided this day required really tacky and bright eye makeup to get me in a festive mood.

We left Alexa and Madison home with Jimmy (evil laugh), and loaded Gianna and Mikayla in the car with us. I don't drive out of my comfort zone, so Jill was behind the wheel of my very spiffy SUV. Problem is, she's used to the gear shift in her van, which is located near the steering wheel. My shift is in between the front seats. So every time she switched gears, she turned on the windshield wipers and the washers! We laughed on and off the entire day because of this. I mean, she literally did this at least 20-25 times throughout our 7 hours of shopping.

Our first mishap was while driving down i-95 at 70 MPH. Remember those cute antlers I had on my truck? Well, Jill, for reasons unknown to me, opened Poopy Pants' window and one of my antlers went flying off the car, never to be found again! But would you believe Jill actually offered to "turn around" and go find it? "Uh, hello! We're on a highway ya doofus! How are you going to turn around??? And don't ya think Rudolf's ear has been squashed by now?" So for the rest of the day we drove around with an SUV that resembled Vincent Van Gogh. Pisser.

Okay, it was the most shit-filled flea market I've ever seen, so we didn't stay too long.

The outlet mall was nice, but the only thing I bought was a tube of body lotion from Bath and Body Works. Mmmm... Vanilla Bean Noel. OMG, it smells sooooooo good!
Here's Jill and Mikayla swinging Gianna through the parking lot.

Now we've arrived in downtown St. Augustine, after going round and round in circles trying to find some free parking. Hey, here's a free place! But oops, if you park here you get yourself towed, 'cause it's only for city employees. But, they did have a great pile of just-cut bamboo and Madison loves anything panda related. So what does Jill do? She jumps out of the car, finds a huge piece of it and shoves it in my car. Great, now I've got bamboo leaves sitting on my head.

Did you know that St. Augustine is our country's very oldest city? And that it is known to be one of the most haunted? This next picture is St. George St. Most of these buildings are original and the country's oldest one-room wood schoolhouse still stands there. The Christmas shop, that just recently closed down was used as a mortuary way back in the day, and the picture window in the front was used to display the bodies so passersby could pay their respects.

This guy looks he might be original to St. George St. too, don't ya think?

Gianna thought this would be a nice time to lay down on the sidewalk and take a little rest. Usually this is accompanied by screams of "Hewp me! Hewp me!"

We had a yummy lunch at a little outdoor cafe.

Here's Jill on the phone with Mark, discussing the menu items. Hey, no husbands allowed today! Do you see the bitch face she is pulling on me?

We even walked up to the very old Spanish fort.

Here we are, sitting on a huge canon.

Okay, so I was going to try and do a sexy laying down pose, but have you ever tried balancing on a canon? I would have rolled right off!

It had been a long day, but we really wanted to stay until it got dark enough for the Christmas lights to come on. We walked down the main street near the water to see all the horses and carriages lined up waiting for fares to tour the city.

Ah, horsey love. And yes, I do realize I look stoned!

Remember I mentioned this being a very haunted city? Well, look at the mist in this picture.
Drop dead, Becky! LOL

But not in this one...

It was a very long, and very tiring day, and we must have walked at least 7 miles throughout. But I tell ya what. I was one happy camper, hanging with the bestest sister in the world and two of my favorite little girls. I couldn't have asked for a better weekend. Don't you agree?

24 "Sister" Lovin' Friends Said:

  • Buffie

    I totally agree! Man, you girls really had a fun and full day, I'm jealous!! I was cracking up at the dancing because you really can't hear the music!! lol! :) Aw, and I love that photo of you and Mikayla!


  • Ma'dame French

    Ohhh what a great post and so many festivities....where to start...umm booobies hello? Too funny! And Vanilla bean Noel is my FAVORITE!! Love it! You are so lucky to have a sister you are close to and have fun with! Cherish these moments ( crazy as they may seem)! Loved your pics and all the happenings! Hugs girl French;)

  • Jill

    Would love to hang out with you guys, you seem to have sooooooooo much fun. You could call me by a nickname so you would not confuse me with your sister Jill.

  • Shelia

    Evening, Justiney! What a day!! Love all the fun you had. That gal must have really liked her boobies, huh? lol Now, you be the sweetest one!
    Shelia ;)

  • Rhea

    That was quite a weekend! You and Jill seem to have so much fun together. It makes me miss my sisters. I'm so jealous.

    I love the tacky eyelashes and eyeshadow...and the fact that you can regrow nipples.

  • Jill

    I totally agree it was a GREAT weekend! One of the best! Did you happen to notice the first pic of you and Mikayla she's looking straight down at your boobs as if to say "milk please"!
    What a weekend so much fun, tears, laughter, pee, wind shield cleaning, mood swings.... did I say mood swings?? Oh the joy of 11 year olds! Our 7 year olds were perfect weren't they? They weren't with us most of the time! :)

  • Alex

    Girl...what tons of fun you all had. Wish I could have been there with you. I love the "fake santa", the panda painted on the cheek and the christmas lights everywhere.

    I hope you are doing well overall. Sorry I've been terrible at getting around lately...I've been buried at work, singing, and this past week, sick..again.

    Love you much, girlie!

  • Happy To Be

    Justine what a fun day you and Jill had ...boy I want a sister to do things with..and girl you looked just like Cher on that cannon..oh so I'm being cute now...loved the video and that guys had some moves...hugs and smiles Gloria

  • Gollum

    The children are beautiful--such gorgeous, happy smiles. I love the wreath. And I can identify with the reclusive community. :-) If I don't comb my hair, and soon, it's gonna be bad.

    Justine, I award you with the Gollum good writing award. You are a great writer. I can always tell when writers read a lot; it shines through in their words.

  • Chris

    Justine, I don't know why, but I'm having the same problem as Buffie with the posts not being updated. Anyway, I found your last one. And I loved it. What a great time it looks like you had with your sister and kids. If I had a dollar for every time I've been to down town St Augustine. We actually spent part of our honeymoon there. It was a hotel near the corner and across the street from the fort. I want to come back , I haven't been there in a couple years and I miss being there.

    Love Ya,

  • Raxx - A day in the life

    Well somebody had a hectic and Christmassy weekend! Your town is so pretty! I too love the pic with you and Mickayla.

    lol!! and yes you do look stoned in that pic!

  • Raxx - A day in the life

    Well somebody had a hectic and Christmassy weekend! Your town is so pretty! I too love the pic with you and Mickayla.

    lol!! and yes you do look stoned in that pic!

  • SchmeckyGirl

    You told me to drop dead on a public website! I don't think everyone else knows our "drop dead" policy. LOL!!! Hey! Why didn't anyone comment that that was mean? lol.

    Well girl you really need to stop telling me everything before you blog it. I would have enjoyed it a lot more if I didn't know most of it already!

    But you all seem to have a blast together and I wish I could hang out with you and Jill and your very fun girls.

  • Life on Bonnie Lane

    Omg, I think that guy is the poster child for White Men Can't Dance! Glad you got out of there before the Cher impression!

    Looks like you had an awesome day in St. Augustine! I can't imagine that they used to put dead people in the window at that mortuary! Eww! "And our special today is Mrs. Smith at $2.00 per pound." No wonder the place is haunted!


  • Gollum


  • mrsben

    FIFTY degrees is cold???? LOL, I'm shaking my head, not my booty..smiles. Trolly rides....hells bells at this time of the year we are having sleigh rides you know the type on snow and the sleigh with runners that is pulled by horses. :) :) :)

    LOOKS like the par-tay was a blast and thanks for the tour to St. Augustine. (Is that A-gus-teen or
    August teen?) I really enjoyed it!

    (Re Santa, if you visited Bridget's site earlier today she now has the link for Santa (or you can do a websearch PORTABLENORTHPOLE. As you have children you 'might' enjoy doing it as it is pretty cute and convincing. Oh, if the child's name isn't on the list, just click on the box "other" (?) and type desired name in.)

    Hugs to ya girl. Always enjoy your postingS.

  • nikkicrumpet

    You guys always have the best time. I swear you write the story so it feels like I'm right there with you. Your eyebrows are gorgeous...sheesh mine are a random mess of crap. I'm jealous! Love Mrs. See my boobies...she'd be a lot of fun as a neighbor! And St. Augustine is such a pretty place. I spent a week there once and fell in love with the shopping district. Now go take a nap...I sure would need one after all that walking!

  • Tootsie

    I almost peed when Jill was talking to a kid that stayed home! lol
    I love the photos and hearing about your adventures! I wish I could come hang one day! It would be soooo fun!
    do you know we don't have any flea markets around here? sucks big time...I loved the flea markets in Orlando when we were there! We also don't have much for outlet malls unless you go to the huge centers...and where I live is big..but not HUGE

  • Mariah

    I didn't know you could regrow nipples. COOL! I think the blue shadow is perfect and not tacky AT ALL!

  • squawmama

    Wow it sounds like you guys had a blast.... Wish I had been there... I love St. Augustine and we use to stay there a lot in some of the very old B&B's... Great memories... So happy you all had a great girl’s day out...

    That party was a riot... Couldn't hear the music at all so it made it even funnier...

    I also do not get updates on your blog lately... I saw it on someone else’s blog and opened it up to check it out... Don't think I would ever forget to read you... I just didn't realize you posted... Love YA


  • NurseChessie

    Just to let you know... I'm only gonna tell you this cuz I'll think you'll appreciate it the most.. I laughed so hard that I farted, Yes FARTED!!!! when you were telling me about Jill turing on the wipers over and over and then finally when she lost the antler cuz I could just picture the whole scene with your laugh and all...
    love ya
    farting chessie

  • santamaker

    You know how to have a good time!
    Enjoyed it!

  • Shelia

    Hi Justiney!! Oh, I forgot to tell you what pretty long eyelashes you have!! All the more to flutter with, my darling! lol Oh, I had to post about the gifts you sent me - I appreciate them so much. Well, on my little camera I turned off the flash and poked on the super macro button. does that help? I just love taking those close ups!
    Have a very Merry Christmas, dear friend!! It has been so much fun here in Blogland!
    Love ya bunches,
    Shelia ;)

  • Tismee2

    OK so how did you sneak this post past me? Especially as it's all about one of my most favourite places? I only just saw this!

    You got any more pictures of the lights and stuff seeing as I have never seen it at Christmas. I actually have a Christmas tree bauble here next to me that I bought at the christmas shop - didn't realise it was closing down.

    Lovely pics of the girls again.

    Did you take a picture of the green clock in the little courtyard where there was a chocolate and fudge shop/cigar shop/coffee shop and Birkenstock? If you look up above the clock you would see the very balcony that we spent sitting on, drinking Budweiser and talking about you!