Here I am doing this for two weeks in a row. That's some kind of record for me because I don't stick to anything. Well, except blogging. Seriously, when I think about it, aside from staying married and still loving my kids to death, I flake out on every other damn thing and always have.
Flakier Than A Croissant
There was the crossword puzzle year when I just couldn't get enough of them. It's all I did all day.
There was the year or so that I sold colored aquatic snails online. That got old real fast. I had four or five tanks going and my hands were always covered in snail slime. They were cute little boogers though.
Here are a couple of violets mating.
And here is what a female's egg clutch looks like if the mating has been successful.
I won't even tell you what I had to go through to get a viable clutch to hatch. Oh, the horrors!
There was the year I went on Weight Watchers and lost 52 pounds. Worked out 5-6 days a week for about 2 hours at a time. I do believe those pictures fried with our old computer but that's probably a good thing. Don't wanna depress myself more than my usual, ya know?
*added at the last minute* Oh, craptastic!!!! I was on MySpace (hate that site) trying to find my best friend from High School (no luck dammit) and decided to look through pictures I posted on there years ago. Wouldn't you know I found the picture I was thinking about from my thinner days. I don't want to put it here because looking at it makes me sad. I could actually look at the following picture and say, "Wow, I was kinda pretty." Now? I don't even see myself in that other Justine, and it hurts. It also makes me realize just how much I've aged in the past 6 years. It's kind of scary. But, you know me... honest to the core. So, after finding the picture I couldn't not post it. Crap. Shit. Damn.
Excuse me while I go kill myself with a blunt object.
Anyhoo, then there was the year I went through the Fly Lady cleaning stage. Too bad that one didn't last.
Yeah, so, I think we all, from time to time, find ourselves unnaturally attracted to a hot actor on the scene, right? I'm not too proud to say that I have, what would you say? A I-want-to-lick-him-from-top-to-bottom-then-bottom-to-top crush on Edward Cullen.
So what if his character is only 17 years old? In actuality, he's like, what? A thousand years old or so. That makes it okay, right?
Well, that and the fact that Robert Pattinson is actually 24, which at the very worst only makes me a cougar. I can live with that.
But last week I came home from Wal*Mart with a Robert Pattinson calendar and Jimmy was all affronted and shit, saying he's just jail bait and he doesn't want him hanging on our fridge where he, Jimmy, would have to stare at him day after day. Actually tried to demand that I bring the calendar back. Bite me,
Guess who's hanging on my fridge? Unfortunately, it's just Robert Pattinson, because when I first clapped eyes on the calendar I just thought, "EDWARD!" and snatched it up. It ain't Edward, with his pale, frosty good looks and amber eyes. It's just plain ol' Robert.
Okay, yeah. That works too. Yum.
Raise Your Hands
My kids are so damn lucky that Jimmy loves going to concerts. Or maybe Jimmy is lucky that my kids love going to concerts. Guess it works either way. Mikayla listens to a lot of hip-hop, but also loves bands like Van Halen and The Beatles. Madison is all about rock, has been from infancy. She'd be in her car seat nice and calm, but the second a System of a Down song came on (and we're talking heavy rock here) she would start bopping her head and swinging her little baby arms all over the place.
Now that she's a much more mature 8 year old (ahem) she is all about Nickelback and Bon Jovi, especially. Last year Jimmy surprised her with Nickelback tickets, and last week he surprised both girls with tickets to see Bon Jovi in April. You would have thought he told them that we'd won the lottery and were moving into a mansion on the beach. For the past week I've heard nothing from Madison but "Jon Bon Jovi this" and "Jon Bon Jovi that", and "Did you know that Bon Jovi...?" He's on her computer's desktop now.
Everybody Wants Some
Now that I've mentioned Van Halen, it reminds me of the other night while sitting at the dinner table with the girls. For some reason, I guess the way Mikayla's hair was messed up, I told her she looked like David Lee Roth. When David Lee Roth had hair, that is.
Hair, yes, but sadly, no taste. And nary a bulge.
She mistakenly thought this was a compliment, and took my camera into the bathroom for some diva shots.
Do you see the resemblance?
Please tell me I'm not the only one that gets a kick out of cracking open an egg and finding a double yolk, then crying out, "Cool! Double yolk!"
I know some of you remember my good friend Rocky the Raccoon from last year, right? Remember, he used to come out of the woods when I called to him and even came within inches of me and let me take his picture?
I've missed him since we moved to the other side of the street, but either he or one of his coonie friends have decided that they want my food, whether it's in a garbage bag or not, and whether it's inside my lanai or not. If Jimmy would just fix the damn screen once and for all I wouldn't wake up to this.
Look! I caught the bastard red-handed! Okay, I didn't, but Strudel's raccoon toy was out here at the time of the crime and Madison thought it made for a great photo op.
Work It Girl!
It may be horrible, but I find it immensely pleasing to watch my girls do manual labor, especially in the kitchen. Mikayla actually washes dishes better than Jimmy. On further thought, that's not saying much, but still, she looks damn cute doing it, doesn't she?
She even did my many coffee mugs.
And while she was busy doing that, Madison was cooking dinner. That's right... she actually asked me to let her dip, bread and fry the pork chops. I did the actual frying, but the rest was all her!
Look at the concentration on her face. That could be because I scared the bejeezus out of her about getting splattered by hot oil.
Cold As Ice
Everyone throughout the country has been having a bit of an arctic blast this past week, and Florida was not exempt from the frigid temperatures. One morning last week I came out here for a cigarette around 6:30 a.m. It was 20 degrees. Twenty. Degrees.
An hour or so later Jill calls me and says this:
"My windshield is covered in ice! I can't believe this!"
Uh, yeah brainiac, that's what happens when it's frickin' freezing out! I cannot believe she called just to tell me that. And believe me, that's all she wanted to tell me.
I'm Officially Twisted
This week, Angie, over at Seven Clown Circus, was giving away 5 of her favorite things. I hit the jackie when I won this awesome Twisted Silver bracelet.
Woot woot! Thank you, Angie!
Favorite Bloggy Quote of the Week
Comes from Stephanie at Mama Still Wears Gucci. I have no clue what the hell she's talking about, but had to love her quote and coordinating picture evidence.
"He's been on the Douche Radar for a long time, but he really went above and beyond the call of Douchebaggery with his remarks to Pat Robertson and Rush Limbaugh on his "news" program recently."
So, was that scrambled enough for ya? Any scrambled Sunday thoughts you'd like to share with me?
Btw... it's driving me CRAZY not knowing who it is that frequents my blog from Shoreham, NY. Please please please tell me who you are!
Pssst! If you love me, you might love my