Tuesday, November 17, 2009

I've Been Liberated! Thanks Strudel!!!

Ugh, I am so stumped for anything to write that it's almost scary.  Me?  Speechless?  Can't be!  But oh, it is. I can't seem to string two thoughts together and it's starting to piss me off.

I'm going to blame it on stress. Or maybe I'll blame it on Strudel. She just poked a few new holes in various parts of my body so I'm feeling spiteful toward her. This past weekend I mentioned to Jimmy my fear that Strudel is somehow mentally challenged.

Soft in the head.

A tad demented.

Possibly in need of psychotropic drugs.

She's eating potting soil at this very moment. But Jimmy says it's our fault she is the way she is.

Don't know if you can tell from this picture, but that's Strudel with her head inside a mostly empty planter.  Yum yum.

See?  Demented.

So like I said, Jimmy says she's not a bad dog, but we're bad owners.

I beg to differ. I have never so much as played tug of war with her, to give her the idea that biting onto and holding onto any part of my person is an acceptable means of entertainment. She doesn't only jump up and chomp down, but does it over and over again and the more you reprimand her the more excited she gets. The more excited she gets, the harder she chomps down. I wouldn't go so far as to say it's aggressive biting, but it for sure isn't play biting either.

She was just at it again and I started videoing her so you'd believe me.

I need Cesar Milan in the worst way. If anyone has any connections, please let me know.

My kinda dog trainer.  Errr... whisperer.

Hell, at this point I'll even take that irritating English chick from It's Me or the Dog.

Just look at her. She's gone all canine doginatrix and shit.

So you know how in the past I've told you that golden retrievers are known to have a soft mouth?  Well I'm here to tell you, there ain't nothing soft about Strudel's mouth.

She loves licking out the remains of tuna from the can.  Sometimes I make her extra happy by smearing peanut butter in it for her.  She then proceeds to skitter and chase that can all over the kitchen.

A couple of days ago I gave her a tuna can to lick and this is what her bear teeth soft mouth has done to it.

Who needs a can crusher when I've got Stru?

Hey, at least she released me from what seemed like a never-ending blog fart, right?  Thanks Stru.

Pssst! If you love me, you might love my stupid sister more. Go visit her at Jill's Believe it or Not, and tell her I sent you!

26 "Sister" Lovin' Friends Said:

  • Amy

    Yep, Strudel girl needs some doggy training for sure.

  • Bird Shit and Baby Caca

    OMG! Best. Dog. Ever. LOVE the can!

  • Jill

    You are pretty darn forgiving..........I would have sent Stru onto a new home by now. Of course, I would not be able to afford her (what with having to replace so much!)
    Good luck to you all,

  • Jill

    You are pretty darn forgiving..........I would have sent Stru onto a new home by now. Of course, I would not be able to afford her (what with having to replace so much!)
    Good luck to you all,

  • Anonymous

    This is very normal behavior for a golden retriever puppy. Golden's do have soft mouths, but they go through a chewing period where they want to masticate everything (6 months to 2 years old). Always keep rawhides close by and Strudel may take to an "aggressive chewer" Nylabone. She is exhibiting pack behavior and you need to show her who the leader is, because she wants to dominate you. Also, is she getting enough exercise? When dogs get bored they start to chew on things. Perhaps checking out a doggie daycare 1 or 2 days a week might help with her activity level and other dog interaction. If trained well, Golden's can be the best dogs in the world!

  • Grand Pooba

    First off, I love the pink and white striped pants! Second, I KNOW what you're talking about. My dog was the worst puppy ever. ever. The only thing that helped was to hire a trainer that came to our home to train him AND us. But the training doesn't work unless the owners are willing to do it correctly. That was the hardest thing for me because I'm lazy, if I see him run off with some trash out of the garbage can for the 15th time, sometimes I just don't want to have to deal with it so I just pretend I didn't see it!

    You can tell I'm going to be a great parent.

  • Michele

    Oh my lord...I really wonder why Strudel is like that. I think you're wonderful owners and she seems happy, so can't understand what's goin on inside that head of hers.

    How is your mom doing? Please know that I'm praying for you and your family...you're in for some good news for a change!!!


  • Rachelle

    I was just thinking you need to contact that Ceasar dog whispering guy then you had him in your post! lol You should seriously try to get on his show! Sorry - I don't have much advice for you. We don't have a dog - just 3 cats. And they are pretty self sufficient. Do you have any obedience classes in your area? I hope she settles down soon and that you don't get any more wounds!

  • blueviolet

    She is so naughty! She clearly doesn't think you're the boss. They say dogs only have one master and apparently it's not you. It must be Jimmy. That stinks though because he's not around much.

    You really do need a trainer. I'm not even kidding.

  • Elizabeth

    See, she IS good for something! My parents dog LOVES to eat Kleenex/tissue. He'll unroll toilet paper! His favorite tissues are USED and pulled from trash cans. When he visits I have to put all small cans up on tables! He always comes in my house and immediately runs upstairs to check out the bedroom and bathroom trash! This dog is 16 years old; not cute puppy behavior!

  • Stephanie

    Our golden was retarded in the opposite way. She was PETRIFIED of EVERYTHING. She wouldn't eat table food unless I put it outside on the ground because she was afraid of plates. She couldn't go to the dog park because she'd cower before any living thing, be it worm, bird, little tiny yipper dog, or human. On the other hand, she was super smart. I think she was perhaps a canine idiot savant.

    Anyway, I'm with everyone else. Probably should get a trainer.

    Strudel is darling, by the way. Teeth marks everywhere notwithstanding.

  • angie

    She's pretty though.............:)

  • ♥georgie♥

    awwwww but strudel is soooo dang cute oh my how i doggers!
    now my dog is crazy...she doesnt eat her treats she buries them...in the carpet...

  • wendy

    Maybe Strudel just needs to come up here and spend some time with Elvis. are dog (sorta) is dumb as hell but really sweet. Hasn't chomped onto any parts of me.

    poor strudel ------and IT IS ALWAYS THE OWNERS FAULT (tee,hee)

  • Ginger

    Strudel's behavior really makes me appreciate my dog. I so lucked out when I adopted him from the pound. Housebroken, and totally trained to do all the commands. But he's not a puppy either.
    My son has a mastiff that they had to hire a dog trainer for. Money wasted....he's still a bad boy.
    I hope Strudel outgrows this bad behavior cause she is so cute.

  • sue

    I have only ever had one dog that was not loving and didn't learn to not bite. He was aggressive and it got to the point I was afraid to tell him no because he would bite me. As long as that is not the case. DO NOT PLAY WITH HER!!! When she does bite, tell her NO! and remove yourself from her company. Turn your back on her, if you can, hold her mouth closed, but not in a way that she will find fun. I can't watch your video so I can't see what she's doing.
    That said Goldens are usually VERY intelligent and will get bored quickly. The also have LOTS of energy so she needs lots of play time.

  • xinex

    Strudel just thinks you are yummy, Justine. LOL!..Christine

  • Cole

    I still think she's going to outgrow the chewing! Six months or so from now - and absolute sweetheart.

  • nikkicrumpet

    Poor wayward Strudel...I'm pretty sure it's not anything that a little Crumpet loving couldn't cure...maybe I'll send him over for a "visit" lol

  • Sara's Sweet Surprise

    Okay J, I'm an expert now that I've had to babysit my sons puppy for a week. I have all the answers to your Strudel problems!
    Here it is....Strudel needs a consistent(operative word) routine along with disciplined training. She needs TONS of exercise to tire her out!!
    Morning and evening walks or in her case... run, run, run! Doggy daycare or the dog park is good for training her how to interact. If she learns how to play well with other dogs and people, in theory she will play well with you too. She's still young enough to train. Right now she looks at you as a plush play toy. She needs to learn you're the alpha female. Just like everyone else in your household does.
    It's truly a HARD labor of love and that's why I have a cat,lol!

    Sweet wishes,

  • Joyce

    I am laughing so hard as I remember the time my daughters dog ate the window sill in our beach house which is still not fixed. My daughter just moved and the dog ate the new wood blinds:) I think the dog thinks she is a termite!

  • NurseChessie

    funny, but I found myself pulling away from the computer screen like she was really gnawing on me. lol.
    really its scary. you better get that not so little girl under control. and I agree with anonymous that strudel is the one in charge. it was obvious that she didn't listen to you AT ALL in the video. my mom has this trouble with their dog. gotta establish master now or forever hold your peace or maybe it will be pieces of clothing in your case. lol.
    love ya
    and good luck!

  • Chocolate Covered Daydreams

    I feel your pain. I think that Strudel needs the Dog Whisperer in a bad way. Does Strudel do that to the kids or just you?

    You do need to let Strudel know who the boss is.

    Now, that being said...I've got an 8 month old pit who thinks he's a lap dog. He wants to lay in my lap all the time. He also doesn't seem to know who the boss is.

    If you get Cesaer to come to your house, please send him my way as well.

  • Amy

    This just CONFIRMS the many reasons why we have NO pets at our house! :)

  • Lori

    Sounds like Strudel needs some help!!!

  • Yaya

    Oh yes. We've got two terrors for dogs as well. Our oldest has chewed apart more furniture than I can remember. More shoes than I can remember. More bags of garbage than I can remember. Probably his most amazing act was eating an entire BJ's box of 28 twix candy bars, wrappers and all, and not even getting sick.